Stop Outsourcing your light: A How to Guide to Finding Your Own Inner Light
How to Stop Outsourcing the Light — And Start Sourcing It Within
Most people don’t even realize they’re doing it—
Reaching, grasping, aching… for the light.
It shows up as cravings, relationships, addictions, hobbies, endless scrolling.
We’re all looking for something that sparks us alive.
And most of us don’t realize it’s not the thing we’re after.
It’s the feeling.
That feeling of love.
Of peace.
Of joy.
Of being seen.
Of being lit from within.
But here’s the truth:
You are not chasing a person, a product, or a peak experience.
You are chasing your own light—reflected back to you.
The Problem: We Were Never Taught to Source the Light Within
No one ever sat us down and said:
“Hey, you already have the light inside you.
Here’s how to feel it. Here’s how to keep it going.”
So we try to pull it from others.
Some people—especially extroverts—do naturally feel lit up by other people.
Others, usually introverts, source their light from solitude, from within.
But we’re all blends.
And even if you’re used to receiving the light from others…
You can learn how to generate it from within.
In fact, you must—
Or you may reach a point in your life where the lights outside you go dim.
And you’re left feeling hollow, confused, maybe even abandoned.
But you weren’t abandoned.
You were just never taught how to hold the flame yourself.
So… How Do You Start?
Here are some ways to learn how to light yourself up from within:
1. Feel Love Without a Source
One of the simplest yet most profound practices is this:
Think about someone or something you love deeply—like your dog.
Feel the warmth, the sweetness, the affection in your heart.
Then remove the image of the dog.
Let the feeling remain.
Just you, and the love.
Not directed anywhere. Just being.
That’s your light.
You’re not borrowing it.
You’re not aiming it.
You’re simply being it.
2. Meditate to Feel (Not Just Clear)
Meditation isn’t just about “clearing the mind.”
That’s a shallow version of it.
Real meditation is about feeling again.
Feeling your own heart.
Feeling connection to Source.
Feeling stillness…
And realizing that even the stillness is alive.
Let your breath guide you.
Let your heart soften.
And sit with the spark that remains.
3. Dance Alone, Be Goofy, Feel Joy
One of the most underutilized gateways to the light is joy.
And one of the fastest ways to access joy is to be goofy. Alone.
Put on music. Dance in your room.
Let your body move like no one’s watching (because no one is).
Laugh. Shake. Wiggle. Sing.
Let your body remember what fun feels like without needing an audience.
And then—pause.
Notice the glow.
That’s your light.
Practice holding it in your chest even after the dance stops.
That’s how you start to manufacture your own light.
4. Practice Holding It Even When Nothing’s “Happening”
Once you’ve felt the spark, start holding it while doing something neutral.
Washing the dishes.
Walking the dog.
Sitting on the bus.
Can you still feel it?
Can you breathe into it?
Can you amplify it just a little—without needing anything to change around you?
This is how you shift from being a seeker of light…
To a source of it.
Final Thought: This Is the Work That Changes Everything
When you stop outsourcing your light:
You stop draining others to feel whole.
You stop tying your worth to your output or relationships.
You stop losing yourself in every interaction.
And you begin to attract people who don’t just want your light—
They bring their own, too.
This is the new sacred self-reliance.
Not isolation. Not detachment.
But the radiant knowledge that…
I carry the flame.
I am the flame.
And no one can take that from me.
